Holes in his shoes, heels slap the pavement. Too big for his feet, jeans ripped, and faded. He moves through dark outskirts of the city. It's winter, no coat, green jersey number fifty. Eyes shifty, on the look out for danger and food. All night, cause his life's all he has to lose. Hair matted from the last time he rested a spell. Foul odor from his body, needs a shower as well. Headed for city lights waistline in hand. Hoping to score a bite that just hit the can. Stomach speaking in a language he translates with ease. Last meal 6 fries, bread edges, and cheese. That was lunch, since then pickings been slim. The church offers food, but that's not for him. His pride's an obstacle standing in the way. Night ahead is uncertain, but he survived the day. Reaches the city, and finds a few discarded scraps. Exhausted from his trek he must take a nap. Nap will turn to sleep in a dimly lit alley. He can't stay long, but rest he needed badly. His daily routine, no place to be. As he fades he whispers "God watch over me." And as night turns to day, and the city comes alive, he lay still in his dreams, rapid movement in his eyes.

Wake up you stupid bum, you can't be in this place. His body flinches as water splashes dead in his face. With a startled look he just rose to his feet. With water dripping from his chin he stumbles down the street. Towards the east and the sun with no place to go. Just time in his pocket, and the clock moves slow. He hears "yo" from up ahead in a familiar voice. Look forward or turn back, it's time to make a choice. See it could easily be someone who means to bring him harm. As he starts to turn away someone grabs his arm. When he turned to pull away the voice began to say, Hey it's me your brother, Mike. He turned and saw his face. Mike began to ask him questions, and say the family worries. Johnny acting all evasive like he's in a hurry. Mike pulls out his phone, and calls in sick to his boss. Talks Johnny into breakfast then they both walk off. They hit a place in midtown with an open air view. Host twisted in the face. Mike says "yeah two". They get led to the back near the restrooms and kitchen. People snicker as they pass Johnny tries not to listen. Mike orders oatmeal, Johnny hash and eggs with a side of pancakes, and some toasted bread. As they eat people stare at this unlikely pair. One in a suit the other dusty with weeds in his hair. For every spoon that Mike takes there's three bites from Johnny's plates. Mike takes a deep breath and stares into Johnny's face. He ask "where have you been? Mom's worried sick." Johnny paused then took another bite real quick. With a mouthful of hash, Johnny says "I know, but things got too deep so I had to lay low." "Lay Low?" exclaimed Mike in an elevated voice. "Four years looking for you!" Mike lowered his voice... "No call on Mother's Day, not Christmas, Thanksgiving. No visit, no letter to let her know that you were living." "We reported you as missing, and the case went cold. Moms never gave up, she puts your face on poles." "Man she getting old, do you really even care?" Johnny lays down his fork, and leans back in his chair. "I'm aware that I've made a huge mistake. I thought to call many times but my mind said wait. See after graduation with my science degree I had a dream about my future, but didn't see me. Now this might sound crazy, but I beg you to listen. Man I dropped everything on a find me mission. And I found myself when hit rock bottom. Now plans, dreams, a goal I got em! And I'm sorry for what I did to you and our mother. Man, I know you expect a lot more from little brother." Mike sat still, closed his eyes, inhaled so deep. Dropped a Grant for the bill, and rose out of his seat. "Let's be out, you already cleaned your plate." Johnny rose from his chair to a warm embrace. As they exited the doors of the midtown spot Mike asked "tell me what's your plan, you going home or not?" "Look at me, Mike. My condition is foul. I want see mom, but I'm saying not now." "Ok. Come to my place and wash your butt. We'll stop along the way to pick some clothes up" Johnny: "You sure about that? You sure?" Mike: "Man, of course I'm sure. Come on let's make some tracks."

"Can I see that, these and those over there? I need a 32 belt, and a hat for my hair." "Nah man, you need a cut". "Yeah you're right scratch the hat. I really like this shirt. Do you have it in black?" "Sorry, only navy blue". "Oh Navy blue's ok." "Good, is there anything else I can help you with today?" "Can I open a fitting room so you can try on those jeans?" "No thanks. I'm sure they fit. I want to wait til I'm clean." "See today's a big day. I haven't been home in years." Johnny paused a moment just to choke back some tears. Mike grabbed him by the shoulder, and gave a nod to the clerk. He said "we're gonna browse around to see if other clothes work." With a smile, the clerk responded "ok take your time". Just holler if there's something I can help you find." "Yo man you cool?" "Yeah bro I'm alright. It just hit me that I won't be in the streets tonight." "I'm about to see mom who I have truly missed. Man you just found me this morning and you're doing all this." "We ain't done, let's pay the bill, head down the street to get a cut, manicure, and some treatment for them feet." "All ready to checkout?" "Please, put it on this card." They each thanked the clerk and then they hit the Blvd. With his head a little higher, and his bag held close. Johnny stood beside his brother and asked "where do we go?" "The chop shop is on the corner, they'll hook you up. They got a female that does nails and a brotha that cuts." They walk north towards the shop with few words said. So many questions Mike had, but he smiled instead. Once they reached their destination, Mike ordered the works. Johnny climbed into a chair feet and hands were done first. The haircut followed, as wads fell to the floor. Johnny smiled back at Mike, they needn't say anymore.

With a fresh new cut, the next stop is Mike's apartment. Mike passed Johnny towels and toothbrush to get started. He pointed Johnny to the bathroom, and turned the tv on. He said "when you're done, we're gonna go see mom." Johnny entered the bathroom, and closed the door, started the shower, dropped his clothes on the floor. He turned toward the vanity then leaned on the sink. Stared at himself in the mirror then he began to think. About his mother, and how she must feel, is she angry, does she cry, does she hold ill will? He wipes the steam from the mirror then he shakes his head. Opens the toothbrush, a few tears did shed. Salty tears and toothpaste the flavor in his mouth. Fills his cup with water, he swish and spits it out. Steps in the shower and as the dirt streams off, leans in falling water, zips to his thoughts. "Why did I never call? How selfish is that? I hope her health is good. Will she take me back?" These thoughts repeat for the duration of his shower. He looks at the window for the exit of a coward. But he stays, and takes a deep breath. Now his sole mission.... put his mother's mind at rest.

From the curb, they made a u turn toward the highway. What started out grim became a bright day. Johnny felt renewed, not cause of the shower, but from the fact that he'd be home in less than an hour. He cracked a smile as he stared in the distance. Mike turned the music down and said "Let's talk a little business." "While you were in the shower I made a phone call." I asked a friend for a favor, he came through and didn't stall." "He's putting in a good word to get you an interview Entry level at his plant this could be an in for you." Johnny took a deep breath, and in disbelief he took the back of his hand and wiped a tear from his cheek. "Thank you, Mike. I don't deserve this. Thanks so much." Mike said, "this is how we were raised we look out for us." "That's not the only call I made before I got off the phone. I called momma really quick to make sure she was home." " I told her I had the day off and if she said it's ok I'd be swinging by her house a little later today." "Of course she said come on. I said I'd be there bout 2. Told her we'd have a late lunch, but I never mentioned you." Johnny said, "I’m excited and scared at the same time." "Well Johnny, if you want to call in advance that'd be fine." Johnny got quiet, Mike pumped the music loud. getting close to the exit, no turning back now. As they veered to the exit to hit the surface streets. Johnny started asking questions about the hood and peeps. "Shorty and Scoot moved away, Trevor's doing time. Remember Ben and Tiffany? Their co-workers of mine." "What about Lisa?" "Ha, I knew you would ask. She was really hurt for a while. When you dipped so fast." "And like the rest of us she feared the worst. She since dated a few guys the last one was a jerk." "So she's single now?" "Man you cut to the chase. I think she is and might faint when she see's your face." They both laughed and just a block from mother's home. Police car pulls behind them red and blues on. Mike pulls to the curb, and kills the ignition. Keeps his hands on the wheel in the officer's vision. As the cop steps out Mike's phone starts to buzz. They both looked toward the center where the cell phone was. It was their mother calling and Johnny's face just beamed. Cause now he see's his mother's picture on this little phone screen. Within a split second Johnny grabbed the phone. He pushed the green button to...

How many thousands have died without a camera on? How many more are brutalized for doing little wrong? How many lives are traumatized from undue harassment? How many cops who do these crimes are sitting free and laughing? Mothers without a child to be a mother to. Once due to lynch mobs, now the boys in blue. We used to say “It’s a black thing, you wouldn’t understand.” Cause it’s us that are the victims of this evil plan. In their eyes we just targets, passed off as a threats Game for their hunt, maybe placing bets They say they fear for their lives from young boys and men The code words for a pass to pierce black skin. With bullets, batons, their boots and blackjacks Not far from castration, nooses and whip cracks Brothers in cuffs treated like they heavy bags By a cop throwing hooks, uppercuts and even jabs It make them feel good to have the upper hand. As they rage on a mission to break the will of man Woman and child are not spared these deeds They quickly beat, kick or let the trigger squeeze You keep your knees on the throats of too many blacks We say enough is enough and we’re fighting back We say enough is enough we fighting back